1
00:00:02,300 --> 00:00:03,300
Going all the way
up to the front.

2
00:00:03,300 --> 00:00:04,560
Everyone follow me.

3
00:00:04,560 --> 00:00:07,180
All the way up here.
File in, please.

4
00:00:07,180 --> 00:00:11,620
Here is the museum's
most valuable piece, "thumb,"

5
00:00:11,620 --> 00:00:15,230
painted by carpaccio macguffin,
the Scottish-Italian master.

6
00:00:15,230 --> 00:00:18,190
This painting is
the last work he ever did

7
00:00:18,190 --> 00:00:19,800
before he went into seclusion.

8
00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:22,710
It is worth
well over $10 million.

9
00:00:22,710 --> 00:00:25,240
Look in front of you.
See these velvet ropes?

10
00:00:25,240 --> 00:00:28,110
They prevent anyone from getting
close to the painting.

11
00:00:28,110 --> 00:00:30,070
All: Ooh!

12
00:00:30,070 --> 00:00:31,900
And as an added level
of security,

13
00:00:31,900 --> 00:00:33,290
look at the sign.

14
00:00:34,680 --> 00:00:35,770
All right,
let's move on to the room

15
00:00:35,770 --> 00:00:37,640
with the boring pots in it.

16
00:00:37,640 --> 00:00:40,170
Follow me.
Right this way.

17
00:00:40,170 --> 00:00:43,260
Everyone this way.

18
00:00:43,260 --> 00:00:45,080
And to your right.

19
00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:51,350
♪♪

20
00:01:20,900 --> 00:01:22,510
Woman: I don't believe

21
00:01:22,510 --> 00:01:24,990
the indigenous people
had microwaves.

22
00:01:24,990 --> 00:01:26,470
And one can only imagine

23
00:01:26,470 --> 00:01:28,000
the bland food
they cooked in these pots.

24
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:30,000
Here we have
well-preserved examples

25
00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:31,910
of Greek and Roman statues.

26
00:01:31,910 --> 00:01:33,520
You can see
that they are a depiction

27
00:01:33,520 --> 00:01:35,350
of the ideal human form,

28
00:01:35,350 --> 00:01:36,920
except for this one, of course,

29
00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:40,230
which is the fat,
slovenly cupid, god of love.

30
00:01:40,230 --> 00:01:42,620
Clearly, he loved pizza
most of all.

31
00:01:44,580 --> 00:01:46,230
Now, follow me over here

32
00:01:46,230 --> 00:01:49,450
and take a look
at the museum's most prized...

33
00:01:52,500 --> 00:01:55,550
♪♪

34
00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:07,820
Tribeca, geils!

35
00:02:07,820 --> 00:02:10,470
Dolby, knock it off, will you?

36
00:02:10,470 --> 00:02:11,910
Sorry, lieutenant.

37
00:02:11,910 --> 00:02:13,260
The other day,
you requested more hubbub.

38
00:02:13,260 --> 00:02:14,960
Okay, well, take it down
to a dull roar.

39
00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:15,960
Got it.

40
00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:20,790
Geils, Tribeca.
My office!

41
00:02:25,100 --> 00:02:26,620
You wanted to see us, sir?

42
00:02:26,620 --> 00:02:29,490
Yeah, you ever heard
of carpaccio macguffin?

43
00:02:29,490 --> 00:02:31,580
The Scottish-Italian master
who disappeared

44
00:02:31,580 --> 00:02:33,710
after painting
his masterwork "thumb"?

45
00:02:33,710 --> 00:02:35,760
Yes. Obviously.

46
00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:37,410
Macguffin's "thumb" disappeared

47
00:02:37,410 --> 00:02:39,240
from the Olsen-medavoy gallery
this morning.

48
00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:40,810
The o.M.G.?

49
00:02:40,810 --> 00:02:42,510
I thought it was at
the Lewis-Ogilvie library?

50
00:02:42,510 --> 00:02:44,380
The l.O.L.?!
Don't make me laugh!

51
00:02:44,380 --> 00:02:46,940
That burned down last year,
so they moved it.

52
00:02:46,940 --> 00:02:48,290
What are they building
in its place?

53
00:02:48,290 --> 00:02:50,120
Another one of those
damn parking garages

54
00:02:50,120 --> 00:02:51,860
from the Wayne-Tyson foundation.

55
00:02:51,860 --> 00:02:54,390
Wtf. I know. Just what we needed.

56
00:02:54,390 --> 00:02:55,820
But you heard about Tyson,
right?

57
00:02:55,820 --> 00:02:59,090
He came down with
a testicular membrane infection.

58
00:02:59,090 --> 00:03:01,000
Tmi? for realsies.

59
00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:02,390
This is your divorce agreement.

60
00:03:02,390 --> 00:03:04,700
B-t-dubs, you got robbed.

61
00:03:04,700 --> 00:03:08,400
I know. Fml.

62
00:03:10,580 --> 00:03:14,620
♪♪

63
00:03:19,630 --> 00:03:21,070
It's okay, kid.

64
00:03:21,070 --> 00:03:22,890
You wouldn't be human
if you didn't have

65
00:03:22,890 --> 00:03:26,070
some type of reaction
to a missing painting.

66
00:03:29,730 --> 00:03:30,900
Scholls, what do we got here?

67
00:03:30,900 --> 00:03:32,730
Whoa, whoa, whoa, detective.

68
00:03:32,730 --> 00:03:34,730
Watch out for the velvet ropes.

69
00:03:34,730 --> 00:03:36,120
What do we got?

70
00:03:36,120 --> 00:03:37,860
Whoever did this
knew what he was doing.

71
00:03:37,860 --> 00:03:40,260
He got past the ropes
no problem. What about the sign?

72
00:03:40,260 --> 00:03:42,000
He was very clever here.

73
00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:43,310
Look how he altered
the meaning of the sign

74
00:03:43,310 --> 00:03:44,960
by spray-painting over
the word "not."

75
00:03:44,960 --> 00:03:48,180
"Do touch."
Man, that's diabolical.

76
00:03:48,180 --> 00:03:50,530
We're taking
as many prints as possible.

77
00:03:50,530 --> 00:03:52,100
We'll let you know
what we come up with.

78
00:03:52,100 --> 00:03:54,840
What's going on
with this pedestal here?

79
00:03:54,840 --> 00:03:56,580
Scholls: Oh, there was
a cupid statue there,

80
00:03:56,580 --> 00:03:58,360
but it was just
a temporary exhibit

81
00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:00,020
on loan from
an antiquities dealer...

82
00:04:00,020 --> 00:04:02,800
A Dr. Zaius.

83
00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:04,020
We're on it.

84
00:04:04,020 --> 00:04:05,980
Well, Tribeca,
time for a check-up.

85
00:04:05,980 --> 00:04:07,550
If the doctor is in.

86
00:04:07,550 --> 00:04:10,550
I sure hope so.
I have a scrotal hernia.

87
00:04:10,550 --> 00:04:12,940
What?

88
00:04:12,940 --> 00:04:17,640
♪♪

89
00:04:28,220 --> 00:04:29,740
I just love old stuff...

90
00:04:29,740 --> 00:04:33,360
Everything about it...
The smell, the feel.

91
00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:35,840
L.a.p.d.
Are you Dr. Zaius?

92
00:04:35,840 --> 00:04:37,920
Oh, no.
Dr. Zaius is my brother.

93
00:04:37,920 --> 00:04:42,100
I'm just Mr. Zaius.
You guys can call me Randy.

94
00:04:42,100 --> 00:04:43,970
Quite a shiner
you got there, Randy.

95
00:04:43,970 --> 00:04:45,410
Oh, thank you.

96
00:04:46,190 --> 00:04:47,500
I call it a mop.

97
00:04:47,500 --> 00:04:48,670
Is your brother around?

98
00:04:48,670 --> 00:04:50,940
Oh, yeah. Sorry.

99
00:04:50,940 --> 00:04:53,770
Randy?
What kind of name is Randy?

100
00:04:53,770 --> 00:04:55,420
It's welsh, actually.

101
00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:57,070
Good afternoon.
I'm Dr. Zaius.

102
00:04:57,070 --> 00:04:58,640
How can I help you?

103
00:04:58,640 --> 00:05:00,560
Wow, you really do look
a lot like your brother.

104
00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:02,910
Really? I don't see it.
Please come in.

105
00:05:02,910 --> 00:05:05,740
♪♪

106
00:05:13,960 --> 00:05:15,350
Would you like some coffee?

107
00:05:15,350 --> 00:05:16,830
Yes, please.

108
00:05:16,830 --> 00:05:18,970
I'm detective Tribeca,
this is detective geils,

109
00:05:18,970 --> 00:05:20,360
and we're here to talk to you
about what happened

110
00:05:20,360 --> 00:05:21,970
at the Olsen-medavoy gallery.

111
00:05:24,190 --> 00:05:25,410
Ohh!
Aah!

112
00:05:25,410 --> 00:05:27,230
Oh, my god, that's terrible.

113
00:05:27,230 --> 00:05:29,450
And really cold. I'm not surprised.

114
00:05:29,450 --> 00:05:31,940
This coffee was brewed
by Napoleon Bonaparte

115
00:05:31,940 --> 00:05:33,850
just before
the battle of Waterloo.

116
00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:37,510
Would you care
for some macaroons

117
00:05:37,510 --> 00:05:39,460
from the age of enlightenment?

118
00:05:39,460 --> 00:05:41,660
How about a potato chip
from the Kennedy administration?

119
00:05:42,340 --> 00:05:44,730
Okay. Were you aware
that macguffin's "thumb"

120
00:05:44,730 --> 00:05:46,990
was stolen from the o.M.G.
This morning?

121
00:05:46,990 --> 00:05:50,480
How awful.
That's such a seminal piece.

122
00:05:51,910 --> 00:05:53,220
That's not what it means.

123
00:05:53,220 --> 00:05:55,000
Apparently,

124
00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:58,140
one of your statues was on loan
to the museum from...

125
00:05:58,140 --> 00:06:00,360
Yesterday to today.

126
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:03,180
I'm always happy to share
my antiquities with the world.

127
00:06:03,180 --> 00:06:05,060
They really belong to all of us.

128
00:06:05,060 --> 00:06:07,140
Can we see it? No. It's mine.

129
00:06:07,140 --> 00:06:09,540
The painting was there.
The statue arrives.

130
00:06:09,540 --> 00:06:12,410
The painting disappears.
The statue disappears.

131
00:06:12,410 --> 00:06:13,800
If you say so.

132
00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:15,410
Frankly, the comings and goings
of the pieces

133
00:06:15,410 --> 00:06:18,020
is Randy's responsibility,
and he's a first-class idiot,

134
00:06:18,020 --> 00:06:19,850
a real dumb-dumb double zero.

135
00:06:19,850 --> 00:06:21,850
Now, if you'll excuse me,
the cake from

136
00:06:21,850 --> 00:06:24,510
Theodore Roosevelt's
35th birthday just arrived,

137
00:06:24,510 --> 00:06:26,030
and it's in terrible condition.

138
00:06:26,030 --> 00:06:27,160
Sit down, zaius!

139
00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:29,430
You're trying to tell me

140
00:06:29,430 --> 00:06:31,040
that that timeline
is coincidental?

141
00:06:31,040 --> 00:06:32,390
How dare you come in here

142
00:06:32,390 --> 00:06:35,040
with your cheap suit
and your lousy haircut.

143
00:06:35,040 --> 00:06:36,570
Where did you get that,
ladies prison?

144
00:06:36,570 --> 00:06:38,570
Salon training studio.

145
00:06:38,570 --> 00:06:40,130
How about this?

146
00:06:40,130 --> 00:06:42,570
I'll make some inquiries
in the art world, ask around.

147
00:06:42,570 --> 00:06:44,920
If I find anything out,
I'll call you.

148
00:06:46,010 --> 00:06:47,140
What's the number?

149
00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:49,190
It's 3... oh, hold on.

150
00:06:49,190 --> 00:06:51,190
Ink dried up.

151
00:06:51,190 --> 00:06:52,450
Go ahead.

152
00:06:52,450 --> 00:06:54,580
It's 3... oh, dried up again.

153
00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:56,760
Go ahead.

154
00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:57,850
It's 3... oops.

155
00:06:57,850 --> 00:07:00,070
Dried up. Sorry.

156
00:07:00,070 --> 00:07:01,550
One more time.
Go ahead.

157
00:07:01,550 --> 00:07:03,680
It's 3... no, it dried up. Sorry.

158
00:07:05,030 --> 00:07:06,680
Go ahead.
It's 3...

159
00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:08,510
Ah, shoot. Dried up.

160
00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:12,120
It's 3... no, it dried up again.

161
00:07:12,120 --> 00:07:14,650
So sorry.
One more time. Go.

162
00:07:14,650 --> 00:07:16,820
It's 3... all right, don't say "it's."

163
00:07:16,820 --> 00:07:19,260
That's what's taking the time...
The word "it's."

164
00:07:19,260 --> 00:07:21,350
You say it, it dries up, okay?

165
00:07:21,350 --> 00:07:22,350
Go.

166
00:07:22,350 --> 00:07:24,480
3... too late.

167
00:07:26,090 --> 00:07:27,960
Tell you what...
I have a photographic memory.

168
00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:30,270
You say it, and I'll...
I'll just remember it.

169
00:07:30,270 --> 00:07:31,270
Go ahead. Okay, 333...

170
00:07:31,270 --> 00:07:33,400
Mm-hmm... 2333.

171
00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:34,930
Okay, start any time you want.

172
00:07:34,930 --> 00:07:36,970
♪♪

173
00:07:36,970 --> 00:07:41,110
I feel like Dr. Zaius
is giving us the runaround.

174
00:07:41,110 --> 00:07:43,890
You think he has something to do
with the stolen painting? I don't know.

175
00:07:43,890 --> 00:07:45,500
I think this one
we just leave unsolved.

176
00:07:45,500 --> 00:07:46,500
Leave unsolved?

177
00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:48,200
I've literally never heard

178
00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:49,590
either of those words
come out of your mouth,

179
00:07:49,590 --> 00:07:51,070
and I've known you
for three weeks.

180
00:07:51,070 --> 00:07:52,470
It's just a dumb, old painting.

181
00:07:52,470 --> 00:07:53,900
Who cares?
"Who cares"?

182
00:07:53,900 --> 00:07:55,560
I've literally never heard

183
00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:56,820
either of those words
come out of your mouth,

184
00:07:56,820 --> 00:07:58,430
and I've known you
for three weeks.

185
00:07:58,430 --> 00:08:00,210
Is there something going on here
I don't know about?

186
00:08:00,210 --> 00:08:02,430
Let's just drop it, okay?

187
00:08:02,430 --> 00:08:04,870
I'll tell you when you
really push me on it later.Fine.

188
00:08:04,870 --> 00:08:07,050
If Dr. Zaius hasn't given us
enough information

189
00:08:07,050 --> 00:08:08,870
to make him a prime suspect,

190
00:08:08,870 --> 00:08:11,360
maybe his brother, Randy,
can chime in.

191
00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:12,970
Are you in or out?

192
00:08:12,970 --> 00:08:15,790
Let's roll.

193
00:08:25,410 --> 00:08:26,760
Oh.

194
00:08:26,760 --> 00:08:28,070
Yeah?

195
00:08:28,070 --> 00:08:30,070
Randy zaius?
L.A.P.D.

196
00:08:30,070 --> 00:08:31,720
Do you remember us
from this afternoon?

197
00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:33,550
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I remember you guys.

198
00:08:33,550 --> 00:08:34,600
Come on in.

199
00:08:34,600 --> 00:08:36,900
♪♪

200
00:08:39,730 --> 00:08:42,040
Nice place.

201
00:08:42,040 --> 00:08:45,170
Thanks. It's cheap,
but it's inexpensive.

202
00:08:45,170 --> 00:08:47,870
No one gets into the
antiquities game for the money.

203
00:08:47,870 --> 00:08:49,650
It's funny that you mention that
because I noticed

204
00:08:49,650 --> 00:08:53,050
that your brother, Dr. Zaius,
was wearing a $1,500 suit today.

205
00:08:53,050 --> 00:08:54,620
We took a look
at his tax records,

206
00:08:54,620 --> 00:08:57,660
and it turns out he owns
a boathouse, a house boat,

207
00:08:57,660 --> 00:09:00,140
a pool house and a house pool.

208
00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:03,060
Oh, I wouldn't know.
I've never been to his house.

209
00:09:03,060 --> 00:09:04,970
Hmm.
Did you paint that?

210
00:09:04,970 --> 00:09:07,280
Yeah.
It's not very good, I know.

211
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:09,280
But I'm... I'm just starting.

212
00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:10,890
A kangaroo
with a light switch for a head.

213
00:09:10,890 --> 00:09:12,810
What do you call it...
A kanger-switch?

214
00:09:12,810 --> 00:09:14,200
Actually, it's a switcheroo.

215
00:09:14,200 --> 00:09:15,990
Clever.
I'd like to buy it.

216
00:09:15,990 --> 00:09:17,640
Oh, you don't want that.
It's a terrible painting.

217
00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:18,990
You can get
something better than that.

218
00:09:18,990 --> 00:09:20,510
That one's garbage.

219
00:09:20,510 --> 00:09:22,210
Did Dr. Zaius give you
that black eye, Randy?

220
00:09:22,210 --> 00:09:24,520
Yeah, but we like to punch
each other in the eye.

221
00:09:24,520 --> 00:09:26,000
I mean, I punched him yesterday,

222
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,300
so it was kind of his turn.

223
00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:29,000
It's a game.
We call it "punch punch."

224
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,520
Your brother doesn't treat you
very well, does he?

225
00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:32,440
Do you know anything
about Dr. Zaius

226
00:09:32,440 --> 00:09:33,880
and the theft
of macguffin's "thumb"?

227
00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:39,620
If you'll excuse me,
I have to, uh...

228
00:09:39,620 --> 00:09:41,750
I have to use the restroom.

229
00:09:43,530 --> 00:09:45,750
Let's spread out.

230
00:09:45,750 --> 00:09:48,450
♪♪

231
00:10:06,080 --> 00:10:07,250
Tribeca, get over here.

232
00:10:07,250 --> 00:10:08,650
On my way.

233
00:10:08,650 --> 00:10:11,080
What's up?

234
00:10:13,090 --> 00:10:14,480
Macguffin's "thumb."

235
00:10:16,130 --> 00:10:18,220
If you'll excuse me, uh,

236
00:10:18,220 --> 00:10:19,960
all my roommates are about
to show up, so I...

237
00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:21,790
You son of a bitch! Aah!

238
00:10:21,790 --> 00:10:23,270
Whoa!

239
00:10:23,270 --> 00:10:24,660
You're under arrest
for grand theft art-o.

240
00:10:24,660 --> 00:10:26,060
It's not what you think.

241
00:10:26,060 --> 00:10:27,100
Give me a reason!

242
00:10:27,100 --> 00:10:28,880
I dare you.

243
00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:30,280
Aah! he just took a painting.
It's not that big of a deal.

244
00:10:30,280 --> 00:10:32,500
Don't tell me how to do my job!

245
00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:33,720
Ohh! give me a reason!

246
00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:35,110
I dare you!

247
00:10:35,110 --> 00:10:36,240
Ohh! Aah!

248
00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:46,550
Things got a little heated
back there, huh?

249
00:10:46,550 --> 00:10:48,210
I don't want to talk about it.

250
00:10:48,210 --> 00:10:50,990
You got to tell me what's
going on with you and this case.

251
00:10:50,990 --> 00:10:52,820
You know we never solve it
till you do.

252
00:10:56,830 --> 00:11:00,660
I was a young art student
living in Paris.

253
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,870
I was living
in the French quarter.

254
00:11:02,870 --> 00:11:04,920
I was just getting out
of a relationship.

255
00:11:13,280 --> 00:11:15,670
That was the worst first date
I ever had.

256
00:11:17,540 --> 00:11:19,760
I needed someone who wanted
the things that I wanted.

257
00:11:21,460 --> 00:11:25,850
And that was
carpaccio macguffin.

258
00:11:25,850 --> 00:11:30,690
It was exciting, exhilarating.

259
00:11:32,300 --> 00:11:36,520
We did things
I never dreamed of.

260
00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:42,310
He was loving,
considerate, thoughtful...

261
00:11:42,310 --> 00:11:44,570
Sensuous.

262
00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:48,570
I knew I had to get out
of there.

263
00:11:51,710 --> 00:11:55,010
I loved him,
but I knew I couldn't stay

264
00:11:55,010 --> 00:11:58,760
because that's what I do...
I leave.

265
00:12:17,300 --> 00:12:20,040
So that was the inspiration
for "the thumb."

266
00:12:20,040 --> 00:12:21,870
Amazing.

267
00:12:21,870 --> 00:12:23,690
You think maybe you leave people
before they leave you?

268
00:12:23,690 --> 00:12:25,520
You think maybe you leave people

269
00:12:25,520 --> 00:12:26,830
before they leave you?

270
00:12:26,830 --> 00:12:28,480
All right, fine.
Forget it.

271
00:12:28,480 --> 00:12:30,050
Let's just put Randy away.

272
00:12:30,050 --> 00:12:31,220
It's up here on the right,

273
00:12:31,220 --> 00:12:32,620
where it says
"police precinct."

274
00:12:32,620 --> 00:12:34,710
Okay, I got it.

275
00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:38,970
Turn to the right.

276
00:12:41,670 --> 00:12:43,450
Turn to the left.

277
00:12:46,590 --> 00:12:49,020
All right. Let's bring in
the whole family.

278
00:12:49,020 --> 00:12:50,590
Come on in.
Come on in, betts.

279
00:12:50,590 --> 00:12:53,250
Okay, y'all ready?
At the count of three, "cheese."

280
00:12:53,250 --> 00:12:55,770
One, two, three! "Cheese!"

281
00:12:55,770 --> 00:12:58,160
You wanted to see us, doctor?

282
00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:00,990
Ah, good evening, detectives!

283
00:13:00,990 --> 00:13:02,390
I took a look
at that painting you recovered

284
00:13:02,390 --> 00:13:04,210
from Randy zaius' apartment.

285
00:13:04,210 --> 00:13:05,910
A genuine macguffin, eh?

286
00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:14,830
We don't know
why you're laughing, sir.

287
00:13:14,830 --> 00:13:16,660
No. Of course.
How could you?

288
00:13:16,660 --> 00:13:19,230
You're not inside my head.
Now, let me show you something.

289
00:13:19,230 --> 00:13:22,190
Now, here we have
Leonardo da Vinci's "Mona Lisa,"

290
00:13:22,190 --> 00:13:25,150
which we had fedexed in
from the louvre museum in Paris.

291
00:13:25,150 --> 00:13:28,800
And here...

292
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:33,630
Here we have a cheap forgery on
loan from a cheap forgery store.

293
00:13:33,630 --> 00:13:35,460
Or is it?

294
00:13:35,460 --> 00:13:37,590
Could this be
the real "Mona Lisa"

295
00:13:37,590 --> 00:13:39,510
and could this be the forgery?

296
00:13:39,510 --> 00:13:41,510
Real, forge.
Forge, real.

297
00:13:41,510 --> 00:13:43,340
Follow the bouncing ball.
Which is it?

298
00:13:43,340 --> 00:13:46,560
I can tell them apart.
Oh, really, detective?

299
00:13:46,560 --> 00:13:48,560
Then why don't you pull out
your big gun

300
00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:50,300
and shoot the forgery?

301
00:13:50,300 --> 00:13:52,440
Great.

302
00:13:54,260 --> 00:13:55,530
Wrong, detective.

303
00:13:55,530 --> 00:13:57,530
You've just shot
the real "Mona Lisa"

304
00:13:57,530 --> 00:13:59,880
and the lab technician
standing behind it.

305
00:14:01,490 --> 00:14:03,660
You tricked me.
I'm not paying for that.

306
00:14:03,660 --> 00:14:05,320
They're both forgeries.

307
00:14:05,320 --> 00:14:08,280
Exactly, Tribeca.
They are both forgeries.

308
00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:11,410
Look at the cheap canvas,
the amateur brushstrokes,

309
00:14:11,410 --> 00:14:13,630
the lack of contrast
between light and dark,

310
00:14:13,630 --> 00:14:15,850
the stickers
that say "75 cents."

311
00:14:15,850 --> 00:14:18,500
Ah.

312
00:14:18,500 --> 00:14:20,990
At last, someone who knows
something about art.

313
00:14:20,990 --> 00:14:22,420
What's the point
of all this, doctor?

314
00:14:22,420 --> 00:14:23,550
The point?

315
00:14:23,550 --> 00:14:25,030
The point?

316
00:14:25,030 --> 00:14:26,690
Ooh, I love an inquiring mind.

317
00:14:26,690 --> 00:14:28,470
Let's have another look
at your so-called macguffin,

318
00:14:28,470 --> 00:14:30,170
shall we?

319
00:14:32,170 --> 00:14:34,650
Oh, my god.

320
00:14:34,650 --> 00:14:36,130
How did I miss this?

321
00:14:36,130 --> 00:14:39,610
Yeah, how did you miss this?
It's so obvious.

322
00:14:39,610 --> 00:14:41,140
Why is it obvious?

323
00:14:41,140 --> 00:14:42,920
It's obvious
that it's a forgery,

324
00:14:42,920 --> 00:14:44,400
although a brilliant one.

325
00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:46,100
The canvas is authentic
to the period.

326
00:14:46,100 --> 00:14:47,400
The brushstrokes are exact.

327
00:14:47,400 --> 00:14:49,230
It's absolutely
indistinguishable

328
00:14:49,230 --> 00:14:50,360
from the original.

329
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:52,020
Except for the fact

330
00:14:52,020 --> 00:14:53,840
that macguffin was crying
when he painted "the thumb,"

331
00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:56,930
and the tears diluted the paint
in the bottom-right corner.

332
00:14:56,930 --> 00:14:59,550
Exactly.
As you can see, no tears.

333
00:14:59,550 --> 00:15:02,940
So Randy forged "the thumb,"
but why?

334
00:15:02,940 --> 00:15:05,550
♪♪

335
00:15:12,430 --> 00:15:14,430
♪♪

336
00:15:17,130 --> 00:15:19,390
How's jail treating you, Randy?

337
00:15:19,390 --> 00:15:22,130
You literally brought me
in here five minutes ago.

338
00:15:22,130 --> 00:15:24,920
Yeah, time goes slow
in the joint, doesn't it?

339
00:15:26,660 --> 00:15:29,840
The painting we got from
your apartment is a forgery,

340
00:15:29,840 --> 00:15:33,710
which begs the question...
Where's the original?

341
00:15:33,710 --> 00:15:36,710
Look, I'll tell you
everything you need to know.

342
00:15:36,710 --> 00:15:39,150
But first, I want immunity.

343
00:15:39,150 --> 00:15:42,240
Immunity?
That's what you want, huh?

344
00:15:45,810 --> 00:15:49,200
You allergic to eggs? Uh, no.

345
00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:50,420
Okay.
Go ahead.

346
00:15:50,420 --> 00:15:53,030
Ow.

347
00:15:53,030 --> 00:15:54,510
That wasn't so bad.

348
00:15:54,510 --> 00:15:57,130
Now, where's "the thumb" at?
My brother has it.

349
00:15:57,130 --> 00:15:59,340
He steals the art,
and then I forge it.

350
00:15:59,340 --> 00:16:01,300
He returns the forgeries back
to the art gallery,

351
00:16:01,300 --> 00:16:03,610
and the police drop
the whole thing.

352
00:16:03,610 --> 00:16:05,920
He ends up with a
multimillion-dollar art collection.

353
00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:07,790
Why roll on him now?

354
00:16:07,790 --> 00:16:10,970
Because he's a total...

355
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,710
Dick!

356
00:16:12,710 --> 00:16:14,930
You don't have to deal
with him no more,

357
00:16:14,930 --> 00:16:18,360
'cause we are about to
take Dr. Zaius down.

358
00:16:20,020 --> 00:16:21,800
Now, you're free to go.

359
00:16:21,800 --> 00:16:24,940
Can someone un-cuff me?

360
00:16:24,940 --> 00:16:26,590
You're not cuffed.

361
00:16:28,550 --> 00:16:31,550
Oh. Great. Thanks.

362
00:16:31,550 --> 00:16:33,160
You can validate your parking
on the way out.

363
00:16:33,160 --> 00:16:36,160
Thanks, man.Yeah. No problem.

364
00:16:39,910 --> 00:16:41,910
Don't move, Dr. Zaius!

365
00:16:41,910 --> 00:16:44,170
You idiot!
Do you see what you've done?!

366
00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:46,220
That was
a priceless moravian vase.

367
00:16:46,220 --> 00:16:48,220
It will take you
a lifetime to pay...

368
00:16:48,220 --> 00:16:50,870
It seems to be fine.
How can I help you?

369
00:16:50,870 --> 00:16:53,140
You're under arrest
for stealing macguffin's "thumb"

370
00:16:53,140 --> 00:16:54,750
from the Olsen-medavoy gallery.

371
00:16:54,750 --> 00:16:56,140
Your brother ratted you out.

372
00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:58,490
Don't be ridiculous.
I haven't stolen anything.

373
00:16:58,490 --> 00:17:01,540
Then how do you explain this?

374
00:17:01,540 --> 00:17:03,540
I have no idea
how that got there.

375
00:17:03,540 --> 00:17:05,190
I'm being framed!

376
00:17:05,190 --> 00:17:07,150
Officer, take him away.

377
00:17:07,150 --> 00:17:10,630
♪♪

378
00:17:10,630 --> 00:17:12,240
We did it.

379
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:14,640
Now let's get this thing
back to a museum,

380
00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:16,330
where it belongs.

381
00:17:16,330 --> 00:17:18,120
Everyone freeze!

382
00:17:18,990 --> 00:17:20,820
You're out.
Go sit down.

383
00:17:21,950 --> 00:17:25,390
Un-freeze.

384
00:17:25,390 --> 00:17:28,740
No tears.
This one's a forgery, too.

385
00:17:28,740 --> 00:17:30,350
Damn it.

386
00:17:30,350 --> 00:17:32,520
But Randy said
that zaius had the original.

387
00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:34,530
What, did he pull
some kind of switcheroo?

388
00:17:36,530 --> 00:17:39,580
Switcheroo!
Switcheroo!

389
00:17:39,580 --> 00:17:41,840
♪♪

390
00:17:41,840 --> 00:17:46,230
Randy zaius, l.A.P.D.!
Open the door!

391
00:17:46,230 --> 00:17:47,240
Take it down.

392
00:17:50,150 --> 00:17:53,590
Go! Go! Go!

393
00:17:53,590 --> 00:17:55,770
Man: Go! Go! Man ♪2: Keep it moving!
Let's go!

394
00:17:57,380 --> 00:17:59,860
Come on! Let's go!
Go, go, go!

395
00:18:15,260 --> 00:18:17,270
It's Tanner.
He isn't here.

396
00:18:21,790 --> 00:18:24,190
Get him!

397
00:18:33,720 --> 00:18:35,940
You know, my first apartment
out of the academy

398
00:18:35,940 --> 00:18:37,850
was way smaller than this one.

399
00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:39,240
You don't say?

400
00:18:39,240 --> 00:18:42,070
10 guys crammed
into a 24-story walk-up.

401
00:18:42,070 --> 00:18:44,210
And you know what the biggest
pain in the butt was?

402
00:18:45,550 --> 00:18:48,430
Ohh!

403
00:18:48,430 --> 00:18:50,820
Opening the damn fridge.

404
00:18:50,820 --> 00:18:52,210
♪♪

405
00:19:01,740 --> 00:19:06,750
It's Tanner.
"Thumb's" up.

406
00:19:08,190 --> 00:19:09,620
All right.

407
00:19:09,620 --> 00:19:11,710
Looks like "the thumb's"
back up at the gallery.

408
00:19:11,710 --> 00:19:13,360
All right.

409
00:19:13,360 --> 00:19:15,060
I got to say you were
pretty terrific back there.

410
00:19:15,060 --> 00:19:16,540
You weren't bad yourself.

411
00:19:16,540 --> 00:19:18,410
I feel like
we're really finding our groove.

412
00:19:18,410 --> 00:19:19,410
Mm-hmm.

413
00:19:20,370 --> 00:19:21,890
My mom was right.

414
00:19:21,890 --> 00:19:24,290
When you meet the right partner,
you just know.

415
00:19:24,290 --> 00:19:26,290
Mm-hmm. in fact, you should meet my mom.

416
00:19:26,290 --> 00:19:28,640
I've already told her
so much about you. Hmm.

417
00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:30,600
Is it weird we don't have
more pictures together?

418
00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:31,950
I got to get out of here.

419
00:19:33,080 --> 00:19:36,040
I'm not gonna let you run away
from a good thing this time,

420
00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:37,560
agent Tribeca.

421
00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:42,610
I got to go take a poop.

422
00:19:42,610 --> 00:19:47,400
♪♪